Tap, tap, tap…Is this thing on? Paging every one that lives north of the Mason Dixon line. It’s that time of the year when y’all can make fun of us for our inability to deal with snow. See these blizzard like conditions we had to deal with last week? This furious winter weather put us out of school for two whole days.
Sure child, you go ahead and stick your tongue out while I look around and wonder why the yard looks so trashy. I swan, people are going to think the Clampetts live here. I walked out this afternoon and there was a pack of shredded cheese sitting on the trampoline. Nice.
Yes, yes, the snow does make everything pretty but I’m a summer girl. After Christmas, I’m over the cold and feel like anything under eighty is a waste of a day. Can you stick your feet in a creek? No? Then I need it to be hotter. This cold is a travesty.
What’s not a travesty is snow cream. Seriously, I’ll take any excuse to use sweetened condensed milk.
My poor kids. They wanted to go sledding so badly. They sat at the top of the hill with our sled and repeatedly tried to shove themselves down it. It did not end well.
The good news is being snowed in gave me an excuse and time to clean out the garage. So…yeah for adulting.
I found this page from my diary in 1986 when I was ten in the garage. It’s basically me pathetically lamenting my lack of ability to do a timed Math worksheet. Oh Math, you and me have never been simpatico.
‘Mom found out I’m starting skills center again. Skills center is if you need special help in something. A teacher holds classes that help you. She just shook her head. It was awful.’
First of all, ten year old Paula, your Mom was probably shaking her head at something else entirely because grown up Paula KNOWS that Mom was not upset with me about this. Mom was way too good of a Mom for this. Also, grown up Paula would like to acknowledge that skills center – which was actually making you miss your library time to do more Math worksheets – is stupid. So, hey ten year old Paula, it’s all going to be okay. I mean, what sadistic system makes you skip library time – the greatest thirty minutes of the week – to do timed worksheets?!
‘I can write stories better than Chris who is a whiz at Math.’ Y’all, clearly I was watching way too many Haley Mills movies at this point in my life or I never would have something like ‘Chris is a whiz at Math.’ A whiz indeed…
I like how I go theological in it – the paper is torn (which is a whole other story) but I’m pretty sure it said something like ‘God has given me a weakness in Math.’ Er, not sure that is how that works Paula. Maybe you should have gotten your nose out of a Babysitter’s Club book and cracked a textbook occasionally. God indeed…
This whole piece of paper makes me livid. Who cares that I wasn’t good at those stupid timed Math sheets. Those timed Math sheets can go suck an egg.
“Skills Center Smills Center!”
You tell them Gracie!
That look on her face was also the look that a lot of moms had on their faces when the half inch of snow we got refused to melt and we had another snow day. I mean, not me of course, because I’m the poster child for being patient and loving with my sweet adorable little precious babies – but other moms. Okay, so maybe it was me.
Heck, as long as it’s keeping them out of skills center I guess they can just stay home.