Apex Predators

It's quite obvious to me that Walt Disney World is in major need of an apex predator.

See...

Apex predators are animals that are at the top of the food chain.

Crocodiles, Grizzly Bears, Sharks and the like...

So, these apex predators help keep the population of other animals under control. 

I say all this because some of the animals I saw roaming free at Disney World were crazy big.

Mutant big.

Accidentally ingested toxic chemicals big. 

These birds and squirrels and bunnies were so big that I kind of expected them to be wearing cast member tags and directing guests to the restrooms.

Take this guy:

This bunny may not look big in this picture but let me assure you he was a hoss.

A hoss, I tell you!

Clearly nothing was interested in eating this monster.

Plus, he was one of those animals that has lost it's fear of humans. 

The squirrels in college were like that. 

You'd be on your way to class and one would be in your way and it would just look at you as if to say:

"You gotta problem with me?"

It kinda reminded me of the possum problem at family camp. 

It wasn't only the animals that were mutant like, though. 

This was too:

Well, there is just no delicate way to put this...

Someone had apparently gotten sick 

...crazy mutant sick...

on the Buzz Lightyear ride at Magic Kingdom. 

The smell was...

Well, it was bad. 

You know...

It kinda smelled like an apex predator.

So, now we know where all the apex predators are in Disney World.